| Sketch |
| Phil Hartman | ... | Mr. Claymore#1 |
| Jan Hooks | ... | Mrs. Johnson |
| Victoria Jackson | ... | Ms. Somers |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | Jimmy#1 |
| Julia Sweeney | ... | Mrs. Lewis |
| Rob Schneider | ... | Frank#1 |
| David Spade | ... | Steven |
⁕Part of this sketch is replaced with the dress rehearsal version in reruns.