| Cold Opening | The Miracle of Fatima '89 |
| Game Show | Die Squaren Ost Berliner |
| Musical Performance | "We Didn't Start the Fire" |
| Sketch | Egg Man |
| Show | Lank Thompson: I'm A Handsome Man |
| Sketch | All About Deborah Norville |
| Musical Performance | "Downeaster Alexa" |
| Sketch | Really Ordinary People |
| Cold Opening | The Miracle of Fatima '89 |
| Phil Hartman | ... | priest |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | American flag Live Voice |
| Show |
| Dana Carvey | ... | John Travolta |
| Phil Hartman | ... | Lee Iacocca |
| Jon Lovitz | ... | Harvey Fierstein |
| Don Pardo | ... | announcer Voice |
| Game Show | Die Squaren Ost Berliner |
| Phil Hartman | ... | Jergen Hathaway |
| Jan Hooks | ... | Wilma Gutgast |
| Victoria Jackson | ... | Frieda |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | Jodel |
| Mike Myers | ... | Klaus Gruber Handelmein |
| Don Pardo | Voice |
| Show | Lank Thompson: I'm A Handsome Man |
| Phil Hartman | ... | announcer Voice |
| Phil Hartman | ... | Jim |
| Jan Hooks | ... | friend |
| Victoria Jackson | ... | Ellen |
| Jon Lovitz | ... | Anton |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | Jerry Pierce |
| Mike Myers | ... | Lank Thompson |
| Conan O'Brien | ... | audience member |
| Christine Zander | ... | audience member |
| Sketch | All About Deborah Norville |
| Jan Hooks | ... | Jane Pauley |
| Jon Lovitz | ... | Gene Shalit |
| Mike Myers | ... | secretary |
| Joe Dicso | ... | director |
| Cold Opening | The Miracle of Fatima '89 |
| Kathleen Turner | ... | witness |
| John Henry Kurtz | ... | announcer Voice |
| Phil Hartman | ... | priest |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | American flag Live Voice |
| Monologue |
| Kathleen Turner | ||
| Victoria Jackson | ... | Kathleen's real voice Voice |
⁕This monologue is replaced with the dress rehearsal version in reruns.
| Show |
| Kathleen Turner | ||
| Dana Carvey | ... | John Travolta |
| Phil Hartman | ... | Lee Iacocca |
| Jon Lovitz | ... | Harvey Fierstein |
| Don Pardo | ... | announcer Voice |
| Game Show | Die Squaren Ost Berliner |
| Kathleen Turner | ... | Brigita |
| Billy Joel | ... | Josef Besselmeier |
| John Henry Kurtz | ... | announcer Voice |
| Phil Hartman | ... | Jergen Hathaway |
| Jan Hooks | ... | Wilma Gutgast |
| Victoria Jackson | ... | Frieda |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | Jodel |
| Mike Myers | ... | Klaus Gruber Handelmein |
| Don Pardo | Voice |
| Weekend Update |
♬David Bowie - "Moonage Daydream"
| Sketch | Egg Man |
| Kathleen Turner | ... | Clarice |
| Dana Carvey | ... | Jimmy |
| Phil Hartman | ... | Egg Man |
| Phil Hartman | ... | announcer Voice |
| Show | Lank Thompson: I'm A Handsome Man |
| Phil Hartman | ... | Jim |
| Phil Hartman | ... | announcer Voice |
| Jan Hooks | ... | friend |
| Victoria Jackson | ... | Ellen |
| Jon Lovitz | ... | Anton |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | Jerry Pierce |
| Mike Myers | ... | Lank Thompson |
| Conan O'Brien | ... | audience member |
| Christine Zander | ... | audience member |
| Sketch | All About Deborah Norville |
| Kathleen Turner | ... | Deborah Norville |
| Jan Hooks | ... | Jane Pauley |
| Jon Lovitz | ... | Gene Shalit |
| Mike Myers | ... | secretary |
| Joe Dicso | ... | director |
| Total Appearances | Characters | Impressions | Voices | Stills | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Kathleen Turner | 8 | 1 | 1 | ||
| Billy Joel | 3 | ||||
| Liberty DeVitto | 2 | ||||
| John Henry Kurtz | 2 | 2 | |||
| Dana Carvey | 3 | 1 | |||
| Nora Dunn | 2 | 1 | |||
| Phil Hartman | 6 | 1 | 2 | ||
| Jan Hooks | 3 | 1 | |||
| Victoria Jackson | 3 | 1 | |||
| Jon Lovitz | 4 | 3 | |||
| Dennis Miller | 1 | ||||
| Kevin Nealon | 4 | 1 | |||
| A. Whitney Brown | 1 | ||||
| Al Franken | 2 | 1 | |||
| Mike Myers | 4 | 1 | |||
| Joe Dicso | 1 | ||||
| Conan O'Brien | 1 | ||||
| Don Pardo | 2 | 2 | |||
| Christine Zander | 2 | ||||
| 54 | 1 | 8 | 10 |