| Cold Opening | Translator |
| Sketch | Airplane |
| Game Show | Wedgie Fever! |
| Musical Performance | "Hot Hot Hot" |
| Sketch | Christmas Party |
| Musical Performance | "Song For My Sara" |
| Show | Police Women |
| Sketch | Drunk Man |
| Cold Opening | Translator |
| Dana Carvey | ... | supervisor |
| Phil Hartman | ... | supervisor |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | translator Live |
| Sketch | Airplane |
| Dana Carvey | ... | passenger |
| Phil Hartman | ... | passenger |
| Jan Hooks | ... | passenger |
| Jon Lovitz | ... | passenger |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | passenger |
| Show |
| Nora Dunn | ... | announcer Voice |
| Nora Dunn | ... | Raisa Gorbachev |
| Phil Hartman | ... | announcer Voice |
| Phil Hartman | ... | Phil Donahue |
| Jan Hooks | ... | Nancy Reagan |
| Victoria Jackson | ... | audience member |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | audience member |
| Christine Zander | ... | audience member |
| Game Show | Wedgie Fever! |
| Phil Hartman | ... | Bill Franklin |
| Victoria Jackson | ... | Kiki |
| Jon Lovitz | ... | Dale Butterworth |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | Hank Whitman |
| Don Pardo | Voice |
| Weekend Update |
| Dennis Miller | ||
| Victoria Jackson |
Explains her movie rating system | |
| Jon Lovitz | ... | Stephen King |
| A. Whitney Brown |
| Sketch | Christmas Party |
| Nora Dunn | ... | guest |
| Phil Hartman | ... | guest |
| Victoria Jackson | ... | Becky |
| Jon Lovitz | ... | Todd |
| Dennis Miller | ... | guest |
| Musical Performance | "Song For My Sara" |
| Show | Police Women |
| Nora Dunn | ... | Tyne Daly /Mary Beth Lacey |
| Phil Hartman | ... | Earl Holliman /Sergeant Crowley |
| Jon Lovitz | ... | Brandon Caswell |
| Commercial |
| Phil Hartman | ... | announcer Voice |
| Victoria Jackson | ... | Jew |
| Jon Lovitz | ... | Jew |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | Jew |
| Al Franken | ... | Henry Kissinger |
| Don Pardo | ... | announcer Voice |
| Sketch | Drunk Man |
| Dana Carvey | ... | Drunk Man |
| Nora Dunn | ... | patron |
| Phil Hartman | ... | patron |
| Jon Lovitz | ... | bartender |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | patron |
| Don Pardo | ... | announcer Voice |
| Show | Police Women |
| Nora Dunn | ... | Tyne Daly#2 /Mary Beth Lacey |
| Phil Hartman | ... | Earl Holliman /Sergeant Crowley |
| Cold Opening | Translator |
| Dana Carvey | ... | supervisor |
| Phil Hartman | ... | supervisor |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | translator Live |
| Sketch | Airplane |
| Angie Dickinson | ... | flight attendant |
| Dana Carvey | ... | passenger |
| Phil Hartman | ... | passenger |
| Jan Hooks | ... | passenger |
| Jon Lovitz | ... | passenger |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | passenger |
| Show |
| Nora Dunn | ... | Raisa Gorbachev |
| Nora Dunn | ... | announcer Voice |
| Phil Hartman | ... | Phil Donahue#3 |
| Phil Hartman | ... | announcer Voice |
| Jan Hooks | ... | Nancy Reagan#2 |
| Victoria Jackson | ... | audience member |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | audience member |
| Christine Zander | ... | audience member |
| Game Show | Wedgie Fever! |
| Phil Hartman | ... | Bill Franklin#3 |
| Victoria Jackson | ... | Kiki |
| Jon Lovitz | ... | Dale Butterworth |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | Hank Whitman |
| Don Pardo | Voice |
| Musical Performance | "Hot Hot Hot" |
| Weekend Update |
| Dennis Miller | ||
| Victoria Jackson |
Explains her movie rating system | |
| Jon Lovitz | ... | Stephen King |
| A. Whitney Brown |
♬The Beatles - "Twist And Shout"
| Sketch | Christmas Party |
| Angie Dickinson | ... | Christy |
| Nora Dunn | ... | guest |
| Phil Hartman | ... | guest |
| Victoria Jackson | ... | Becky |
| Jon Lovitz | ... | Todd |
| Dennis Miller | ... | guest |
| Musical Performance | "Song For My Sara" |
| Show | Police Women |
| Angie Dickinson | ... | Pepper |
| Nora Dunn | ... | Tyne Daly#2 /Mary Beth Lacey |
| Phil Hartman | ... | Earl Holliman /Sergeant Crowley |
| Jon Lovitz | ... | Brandon Caswell |
| Commercial |
| Phil Hartman | ... | announcer Voice |
| Victoria Jackson | ... | Jew |
| Jon Lovitz | ... | Jew |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | Jew |
| Al Franken | ... | Henry Kissinger#5 |
| Don Pardo | ... | announcer Voice |
| Sketch | Drunk Man |
| Angie Dickinson | ... | Julie |
| Dana Carvey | ... | Drunk Man |
| Nora Dunn | ... | patron |
| Phil Hartman | ... | patron |
| Jon Lovitz | ... | bartender |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | patron |
| Don Pardo | ... | announcer Voice |
⁕The theme music for this sketch was later used for Weekend Update with Norm MacDonald.
♬Miles Davis - "Freddie Freeloader"
| Total Appearances | Characters | Impressions | Voices | Stills | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Angie Dickinson | 5 | ||||
| Buster Poindexter | 1 | ||||
| David Gilmour | 1 | ||||
| The Banshees of Blue | 1 | ||||
| Soozie Tyrell | 1 | ||||
| The Uptown Horns | 1 | ||||
| Dana Carvey | 3 | ||||
| Nora Dunn | 5 | 2 | 1 | ||
| Phil Hartman | 8 | 1 | 2 | 2 | |
| Jan Hooks | 2 | 1 | |||
| Victoria Jackson | 6 | ||||
| Jon Lovitz | 7 | 1 | |||
| Dennis Miller | 2 | ||||
| Kevin Nealon | 6 | ||||
| A. Whitney Brown | 1 | ||||
| Lew Del Gatto | 1 | ||||
| Alex Foster | 1 | ||||
| Al Franken | 1 | 1 | |||
| Earl Gardner | 1 | ||||
| Tony Garnier | 1 | ||||
| Cheryl Hardwick | 1 | ||||
| Don Pardo | 3 | 3 | |||
| Chris Parker | 1 | ||||
| Leon Pendarvis | 1 | ||||
| Lenny Pickett | 1 | ||||
| G.E. Smith | 1 | ||||
| Steve Turre | 1 | ||||
| T-Bone Wolk | 1 | ||||
| Christine Zander | 1 | ||||
| 66 | 1 | 7 | 6 |