| Cold Opening | Press Conference |
| Joan Cusack | ... | reporter |
| Nora Dunn | ... | reporter |
| Jon Lovitz | ... | reporter |
| Dennis Miller | Live | |
| Randy Quaid | ... | Herb |
| A. Whitney Brown | ... | reporter |
| Tom Davis | ... | reporter |
| Jim Downey | ... | reporter |
| Carol Leifer | ... | reporter |
| Evie Murray | ... | reporter |
| Robert Smigel | ... | reporter |
| John Swartzwelder | ... | reporter |
| Allan Havey | ... | reporter |