| Sketch | The Cardinals |
| Alec Baldwin | ... | Pope John Paul II |
| Jimmy Fallon | ... | William H. Keeler |
| Will Ferrell | ... | Edward Egan |
| Darrell Hammond | ... | Francis George |
| Chris Parnell | ... | Adam Maida |
| Jeff Richards | ... | Theodore McCarrick |
| Steve Higgins | ... | narrator Voice |