| Sketch | Substitute Teacher |
| John Goodman | ... | Principal Dawson |
| Jim Breuer | ... | student |
| Will Ferrell | ... | Hoyt |
| Cheri Oteri | ... | Joyce |
| Molly Shannon | ... | student |
| Nancy Walls | ... | Skulltalker |
| Chris Kattan | ... | Suel Forrester |
| Dennis McNicholas | ... | student |
| Ryan Shiraki | ... | student |