| Cold Opening | The Bobbitt Trial |
| Sketch | Roommates |
| Musical Performance | "'Round Here" |
| Show | Blossom |
| Musical Sketch | Lunchlady Land |
| Sketch | Family Vacations |
| Musical Performance | "Mr. Jones" |
| Show | 20 Questions |
| Miscellaneous | Apology |
| Cold Opening | The Bobbitt Trial |
| Ellen Cleghorne | ... | attorney Voice |
| Melanie Hutsell | ... | Tonya Harding |
| Mike Myers | ... | John Wayne Bobbitt |
| Julia Sweeney | ... | Cynthia McFadden Live |
| Sketch | Roommates |
| Ellen Cleghorne | ... | Lisa |
| Melanie Hutsell | ... | Laura |
| Rob Schneider | ... | Jennifer Kenton |
| Sarah Silverman | ... | Candice |
| Sketch | Tater Junction |
| Weekend Update |
| Kevin Nealon | ||
| Norm MacDonald |
Commentary on figure skating | |
| Sarah Silverman |
Personal news of the week |
| Show | Blossom |
| Melanie Hutsell | ... | Mayim Bialik /Blossom |
| Mike Myers | ... | Joey Lawrence /Joey |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | Ted Wass /Nick |
| Don Pardo | ... | announcer Voice |
| Musical Sketch | Lunchlady Land |
| Ellen Cleghorne | ... | chocolate pudding |
| Chris Farley | ... | lunchlady |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | Sloppy Joe |
| Adam Sandler | ||
| Norm MacDonald | ... | green bean |
| Sarah Silverman | ... | chop suey |
| Steve Koren | ... | liver and onions |
| David Mandel | ... | pepperoni pizza |
| Fred Wolf | ... | garlic bread |
| Sketch | Family Vacations |
| Chris Farley | ... | son |
| Phil Hartman | ... | Michael Eisner |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | Bob |
| Adam Sandler | ... | Mickey Mouse |
| Julia Sweeney | ... | Carol |
| Jay Mohr | ... | waiter |
| Sketch | Tater Junction |
| Cold Opening | The Bobbitt Trial |
| Melanie Hutsell | ... | Tonya Harding |
| Mike Myers | ... | John Wayne Bobbitt |
| Julia Sweeney | ... | Cynthia McFadden Live |
| Show | Blossom |
| Sara Gilbert | ... | Jenna von Oÿ /Six |
| Melanie Hutsell | ... | Mayim Bialik /Blossom |
| Mike Myers | ... | Joey Lawrence /Joey |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | Ted Wass /Nick |
| Cold Opening | The Bobbitt Trial |
| Ellen Cleghorne | ... | attorney Voice |
| Melanie Hutsell | ... | Tonya Harding |
| Mike Myers | ... | John Wayne Bobbitt |
| Julia Sweeney | ... | Cynthia McFadden Live |
| Sketch | Roommates |
| Sara Gilbert | ... | Nancy |
| Ellen Cleghorne | ... | Lisa |
| Melanie Hutsell | ... | Laura |
| Rob Schneider | ... | Jennifer Kenton |
| Sarah Silverman | ... | Candice |
| Sketch | Tater Junction |
| Sara Gilbert | ... | Misty |
| Chris Farley | ... | Cindy Crawford |
| Adam Sandler | ... | Lucy Brawn |
| Rob Schneider | ... | Tammy |
| David Spade | ... | Christy Henderson |
| Kyle Dunnigan | ... | patron |
| Weekend Update |
| Kevin Nealon | ||
| Norm MacDonald |
Commentary on figure skating | |
| Sarah Silverman |
Personal news of the week |
⁕Sarah Silverman's commentary originally appeared at two previous dress rehearsals: 10.23.1993 and 01.08.1994.
| Show | Blossom |
| Sara Gilbert | ... | Jenna von Oÿ /Six |
| Melanie Hutsell | ... | Mayim Bialik /Blossom |
| Mike Myers | ... | Joey Lawrence /Joey |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | Ted Wass /Nick |
| Don Pardo | ... | announcer Voice |
| Musical Sketch | Lunchlady Land |
| Ellen Cleghorne | ... | chocolate pudding |
| Chris Farley | ... | lunchlady |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | Sloppy Joe |
| Adam Sandler | ||
| Norm MacDonald | ... | green bean |
| Sarah Silverman | ... | chop suey |
| Steve Koren | ... | liver and onions |
| David Mandel | ... | pepperoni pizza |
| Fred Wolf | ... | garlic bread |
| Sketch | Family Vacations |
| Sara Gilbert | ... | Stephanie |
| Chris Farley | ... | son |
| Phil Hartman | ... | Michael Eisner |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | Bob |
| Adam Sandler | ... | Mickey Mouse |
| Julia Sweeney | ... | Carol |
| Jay Mohr | ... | waiter |
| Andy Murphy | ... | guest |
| Total Appearances | Characters | Impressions | Voices | Stills | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Sara Gilbert | 8 | 1 | |||
| Counting Crows | 2 | ||||
| Ellen Cleghorne | 3 | 1 | |||
| Chris Farley | 4 | 1 | |||
| Phil Hartman | 3 | 1 | |||
| Melanie Hutsell | 3 | 2 | |||
| Tim Meadows | 1 | 1 | |||
| Mike Myers | 3 | 1 | 2 | 1 | |
| Kevin Nealon | 5 | 1 | |||
| Adam Sandler | 3 | 1 | |||
| Rob Schneider | 4 | 1 | |||
| David Spade | 1 | 1 | |||
| Julia Sweeney | 3 | 1 | |||
| Al Franken | |||||
| Norm MacDonald | 2 | ||||
| Jay Mohr | 1 | ||||
| Sarah Silverman | 3 | ||||
| Steve Koren | 1 | ||||
| David Mandel | 1 | ||||
| Don Pardo | 2 | 2 | |||
| Fred Wolf | 1 | ||||
| Kyle Dunnigan | 1 | ||||
| Andy Murphy | 1 | ||||
| 56 | 5 | 9 | 4 |