| Show | Adopt A Pet |
| Show | Road To The White House “Daniel's Diner” |
| Sketch | Dahmer's Defense |
| Musical Performance | "Go Back to Your Woods" |
| Game Show | Bob Swerski's Quiz Masters |
| Sketch | Van Morrison Concert |
| Musical Performance | "The Weight" |
| Miscellaneous | Backstage “Comforting Tim” |
| Cold Opening |
| Dana Carvey | ... | Garth Algar Live |
| Phil Hartman | ... | cable announcer Voice |
| Mike Myers | ... | Wayne Campbell Live |
| Show | Road To The White House “Daniel's Diner” |
| Dana Carvey | ... | George Bush |
| Chris Farley | ... | patron |
| Phil Hartman | ... | Bill |
| Victoria Jackson | ... | patron |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | patron |
| Julia Sweeney | ... | patron |
| Siobhan Fallon | ... | Mrs. Daniel |
| Rob Schneider | ... | patron |
| Sketch | Dahmer's Defense |
| Phil Hartman | ... | Alan |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | Paul |
| Chris Rock | ... | guard |
| Tom Davis | ... | reporter |
| Musical Performance | "Go Back to Your Woods" |
| Weekend Update |
| Kevin Nealon | ||
| Chris Rock |
Commentary on Arizona voting against Martin Luther King Jr. Day |
| Game Show | Bob Swerski's Quiz Masters |
| Sketch | Van Morrison Concert |
| Phil Hartman | ... | spectator |
| Victoria Jackson | ... | spectator |
| Julia Sweeney | ... | Liz |
| Tim Meadows | ... | spectator |
| David Spade | ... | spectator |
| Melanie Hutsell | ... | spectator |
| Tom Davis | ... | stadium announcer Voice |
| Bonnie Turner | ... | spectator |
| Terry Turner | ... | spectator |
| Musical Performance | "The Weight" |
| Commercial | Kaufman's Big And Tall, And Short And Small Sephardic Jew Men's Clothing Store |
| Rob Schneider | ... | Hal Kaufman |
| Don Pardo | ... | announcer Voice |
| Weekend Update |
| Chevy Chase | ||
| Chevy Chase | ||
| Chevy Chase | ||
| Chevy Chase |
A brief history of breast implants and their problems |
| Cold Opening |
| Dana Carvey | ... | Garth Algar#15 Live |
| Mike Myers | ... | Wayne Campbell#15 Live |
| Game Show | Bob Swerski's Quiz Masters |
| George Wendt | ... | Bob Swerski#4 |
| Chris Farley | ... | Todd O'Connor#5 |
| Mike Myers | ... | Pat Arnold#5 |
| Beth Cahill | ... | Denise Swerski#2 |
| Robert Smigel | ... | Carl Wollarski#5 |
| Cold Opening |
| Dana Carvey | ... | Garth Algar#15 Live |
| Phil Hartman | ... | cable announcer Voice |
| Mike Myers | ... | Wayne Campbell#15 Live |
| Commercial |
| Victoria Jackson | ... | wife |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | husband |
| Al Franken | ... | announcer Voice |
♬Dick Walter - "In Love"
| Show | Adopt A Pet |
| Chevy Chase | ... | Tom Hanes |
| Victoria Jackson | ... | Terri Hanes |
| Julia Sweeney | ... | caller Voice |
| Show | Road To The White House “Daniel's Diner” |
| Dana Carvey | ... | George Bush#30 |
| Chris Farley | ... | patron |
| Phil Hartman | ... | Bill |
| Victoria Jackson | ... | patron |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | patron |
| Julia Sweeney | ... | patron |
| Siobhan Fallon | ... | Mrs. Daniel |
| Rob Schneider | ... | patron |
| Sketch | Dahmer's Defense |
| Chevy Chase | ... | Jeffrey Dahmer |
| Phil Hartman | ... | Alan |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | Paul |
| Chris Rock | ... | guard |
| Tom Davis | ... | reporter |
| Musical Performance | "Go Back to Your Woods" |
| Weekend Update |
| Kevin Nealon | ||
| Chevy Chase | ||
| Chevy Chase | ||
| Chevy Chase | ||
| Chris Rock |
Commentary on Arizona voting against Martin Luther King Jr. Day | |
| Chevy Chase |
A brief history of breast implants and their problems |
| Game Show | Bob Swerski's Quiz Masters |
| George Wendt | ... | Bob Swerski#4 |
| John Henry Kurtz | ... | announcer Voice |
| Chris Farley | ... | Todd O'Connor#5 |
| Mike Myers | ... | Pat Arnold#5 |
| Beth Cahill | ... | Denise Swerski#2 |
| Robert Smigel | ... | Carl Wollarski#5 |
| Sketch | Van Morrison Concert |
| Chevy Chase | ... | Alan |
| Phil Hartman | ... | spectator |
| Victoria Jackson | ... | spectator |
| Julia Sweeney | ... | Liz |
| Tim Meadows | ... | spectator |
| David Spade | ... | spectator |
| Melanie Hutsell | ... | spectator |
| Tom Davis | ... | stadium announcer Voice |
| Bonnie Turner | ... | spectator |
| Terry Turner | ... | spectator |
⁕This sketch is removed in reruns. To fill time, "Million Dollar Zombie" from 03.21.1992 is shown later in the episode.
♬Van Morrison - "Moondance"
| Musical Performance | "The Weight" |
| Commercial | Kaufman's Big And Tall, And Short And Small Sephardic Jew Men's Clothing Store |
| Chevy Chase | ... | Enrique Kaufman |
| Rob Schneider | ... | Hal Kaufman |
| Don Pardo | ... | announcer Voice |
♬Laurie Johnson - "Happy-Go-Lively"
| Total Appearances | Characters | Impressions | Voices | Stills | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Chevy Chase | 7 | 1 | |||
| Robbie Robertson | 2 | ||||
| George Wendt | 1 | 1 | |||
| Monk Boudreaux | 2 | ||||
| Bruce Hornsby | 2 | ||||
| Ivan Neville | 2 | ||||
| John Henry Kurtz | 1 | 1 | |||
| Dana Carvey | 2 | 1 | 1 | ||
| Chris Farley | 2 | 1 | |||
| Phil Hartman | 4 | 1 | |||
| Victoria Jackson | 5 | ||||
| Mike Myers | 2 | 2 | |||
| Kevin Nealon | 4 | ||||
| Chris Rock | 2 | ||||
| Julia Sweeney | 3 | 1 | |||
| Ellen Cleghorne | |||||
| Siobhan Fallon | 1 | ||||
| Tim Meadows | 2 | ||||
| Adam Sandler | |||||
| Rob Schneider | 2 | ||||
| David Spade | 1 | ||||
| Beth Cahill | 1 | 1 | |||
| Al Franken | 1 | 1 | |||
| Melanie Hutsell | 1 | ||||
| Robert Smigel | 1 | 1 | |||
| Matt Chamberlain | 2 | ||||
| Tom Davis | 2 | 1 | |||
| Lew Del Gatto | 2 | ||||
| Earl Gardner | 2 | ||||
| Don Pardo | 1 | 1 | |||
| Lenny Pickett | 2 | ||||
| G.E. Smith | 1 | ||||
| Bonnie Turner | 1 | ||||
| Terry Turner | 1 | ||||
| Steve Turre | 2 | ||||
| George Young | 2 | ||||
| 69 | 7 | 2 | 6 |