| Cold Opening | Cable Shopping Network |
| Phil Hartman | ... | Jimmy "The Greek" Snyder |
| Jan Hooks | ... | Mavis /caller Voice |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | Brent Musburger Live |
| Don Pardo | ... | announcer Voice |
⁕This sketch is replaced with the dress rehearsal version in reruns.
| Cold Opening | Cable Shopping Network |
| Phil Hartman | ... | Jimmy "The Greek" Snyder |
| Jan Hooks | ... | Mavis /caller Voice |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | Brent Musburger Live |
| Don Pardo | ... | announcer Voice |
⁕This sketch is replaced with the dress rehearsal version in reruns.