| Cold Opening | Lifestyles of the Rich, Famous and Scary |
| Commercial | “Fiber” |
| Show | The Winning Spirit |
| Sketch | Don't Go Down To The Basement |
| Sketch | Campfire Stories |
| Musical Performance | "Strap Me In" |
| Sketch | Marriage Counselor |
| Sketch | Count Dracula, Self-Taught Auto Mechanic |
| Sketch | Mascot Ideas |
| Musical Performance | "Double Trouble" |
| Sketch | Investment Firm |
| Commercial | “Fiber” |
| Dana Carvey | ... | singer |
| Nora Dunn | ... | Peggy Lee |
| Phil Hartman | ... | announcer Voice |
| Phil Hartman | ... | singer |
| Jon Lovitz | ... | singer |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | singer |
| Sketch | Don't Go Down To The Basement |
| Dana Carvey | ... | Eddie |
| Nora Dunn | ... | Mrs. Simpson |
| Phil Hartman | ... | police captain |
| Victoria Jackson | ... | Susie |
| Jon Lovitz | ... | Kenneth Simpson |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | police lieutenant |
| Al Franken | ... | monster |
| Sketch | Count Dracula, Self-Taught Auto Mechanic |
| Dana Carvey | ... | motorist |
| Jan Hooks | ... | motorist |
| Jon Lovitz | ... | Count Dracula |
| Sketch | Mascot Ideas |
| Dana Carvey | ... | Craig |
| Jan Hooks | ... | student |
| Victoria Jackson | ... | Cindy |
| Jon Lovitz | ... | student |
| Cold Opening | Lifestyles of the Rich, Famous and Scary |
| Dana Carvey | ... | Robin Leach#4 Live |
| Cold Opening | Lifestyles of the Rich, Famous and Scary |
| Ric Ocasek | ||
| Elvira | ||
| Dana Carvey | ... | Robin Leach#4 Live |
| Commercial | “Fiber” |
| Dana Carvey | ... | singer |
| Nora Dunn | ... | Peggy Lee |
| Phil Hartman | ... | singer |
| Phil Hartman | ... | announcer Voice |
| Jon Lovitz | ... | singer |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | singer |
| Show | The Winning Spirit |
| Dabney Coleman | ... | Hal Everett |
| Jan Hooks | ... | Deborah |
⁕In reruns, about a minute of dialogue is replaced with the dress rehearsal version.
♬John Cameron - "Giant Step Ahead"
| Sketch | Don't Go Down To The Basement |
| Dana Carvey | ... | Eddie |
| Nora Dunn | ... | Mrs. Simpson |
| Phil Hartman | ... | police captain |
| Victoria Jackson | ... | Susie |
| Jon Lovitz | ... | Kenneth Simpson |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | police lieutenant |
| Al Franken | ... | monster |
⁕In reruns, several edits are made to improve pacing.
♬Basil Poledouris - "Across The Board"
♬Basil Poledouris - "Robo & ED 209 Fight"
| Weekend Update |
| Dennis Miller | ||
| Elvira |
Commentary on the true meaning of Halloween |
⁕The ventriloquist dummy that Dennis Miller holds up is the same one Christopher Guest used when he played Señor Cosa.
⁕Elvira's commentary is removed in reruns. To fill time, a film entitled "Ed's Secret Life" is shown later in the episode.
♬David Bowie - "Suffragette City"
| Sketch | Marriage Counselor |
| Dabney Coleman | ... | Dr. Dick Mauser |
| Nora Dunn | ... | Mary Beth |
| Kevin Nealon | ... | Gary |
| Sketch | Count Dracula, Self-Taught Auto Mechanic |
| Dana Carvey | ... | motorist |
| Jan Hooks | ... | motorist |
| Jon Lovitz | ... | Count Dracula |
⁕In reruns, several edits are made to improve pacing, and lightning is added to the shot of the bat carrying the tool box.
⁕Jon Lovitz accidentally says "one but all... all but one". In reruns, this portion is replaced with the dress rehearsal version.
| Show |
| Dabney Coleman | ... | Jerry Lyle |
| Mark McKinney | ... | announcer Voice |
| Nora Dunn | ... | Pat Stevens#14 |
♬Van Phillips & The Connaught Light Orchestra - "Buffoonery"
| Sketch | Mascot Ideas |
| Dabney Coleman | ... | teacher |
| Dana Carvey | ... | Craig |
| Jan Hooks | ... | student |
| Victoria Jackson | ... | Cindy |
| Jon Lovitz | ... | student |
⁕Jan Hooks accidentally says "we could invite... we could have an assembly". This is fixed in reruns.
| Sketch | Investment Firm |
| Dabney Coleman | ... | Bob Hudnut |
| Victoria Jackson | ... | secretary |
| Jon Lovitz | ... | Ted Rifkin |
| Total Appearances | Characters | Impressions | Voices | Stills | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Dabney Coleman | 7 | ||||
| The Cars | 2 | ||||
| Ric Ocasek | 1 | ||||
| Elvira | 2 | ||||
| Mark McKinney | 1 | 1 | |||
| Dana Carvey | 6 | 1 | |||
| Nora Dunn | 4 | 1 | 1 | ||
| Phil Hartman | 2 | 1 | |||
| Jan Hooks | 3 | ||||
| Victoria Jackson | 3 | ||||
| Jon Lovitz | 6 | ||||
| Dennis Miller | 1 | ||||
| Kevin Nealon | 3 | ||||
| A. Whitney Brown | |||||
| Al Franken | 1 | ||||
| 42 | 1 | 2 | 2 |