| Sketch | Donnie's Party |
| Show | Fretts Film Forum |
| Show | FANatic |
| Musical Performance | "Limp" |
| Sketch | Police Training |
| Game Show | Who Wants To Be Groped By An Eleven Thousand-aire? |
| Cold Opening |
| Will Ferrell | ... | announcer Voice |
| Darrell Hammond | ... | Ted Koppel |
| Tim Meadows | ... | Franklin Live |
| Horatio Sanz | ... | Pig Pen Live |
| Rachel Dratch | ... | Marcy Live |
| Sketch | Donnie's Party |
| Show | Fretts Film Forum |
| Jimmy Fallon | ... | Roger E. Marshall |
| Will Ferrell | ... | J. Jay Granger |
| Ana Gasteyer | ... | Carol Fretts |
| Cheri Oteri | ... | Joanna Pilsner |
| Weekend Update |
| Darrell Hammond | ... | announcer Voice |
| Colin Quinn | ||
| Will Ferrell | ... | George W. Bush |
| Chris Parnell | ... | John McCain |
| Tim Meadows | ... | Alan Keyes |
| Jimmy Fallon | ... | janitor Voice |
| Sketch | Police Training |
| Jimmy Fallon | ... | John Helman |
| Tracy Morgan | ... | recruit |
| Chris Parnell | ... | Blaunski |
| Horatio Sanz | ... | recruit |
| Molly Shannon | ... | Sally O'Malley |
| Rachel Dratch | ... | recruit |
| Game Show | Who Wants To Be Groped By An Eleven Thousand-aire? |
| Will Ferrell | ... | Jay Thomas |
| Ana Gasteyer | ... | Sharon Gaynor |
| Chris Kattan | ... | Andy Cantrall |
| Cheri Oteri | ... | Tina Hagar |
| Chris Parnell | ... | announcer Voice |
| Sketch | Donnie's Party |
| Ben Affleck | ... | Donnie Bartalotti#1 |
| Jimmy Fallon | ... | Pat Sullivan#3 |
| Horatio Sanz | ... | Frankie Hilbert#2 |
| Rachel Dratch | ... | Denise McDenna#3 |
| Sketch |
| Jimmy Fallon | ... | Todd Newton#2 |
| Darrell Hammond | ... | Bruce Vilanch |
| Horatio Sanz | ... | Camryn Manheim#1 |
| Weekend Update |
| Will Ferrell | ... | George W. Bush#4 |
| Chris Parnell | ... | John McCain#2 |
| Tim Meadows | ... | Alan Keyes#3 |
| Cold Opening |
| Will Ferrell | ... | announcer Voice |
| Darrell Hammond | ... | Ted Koppel#13 |
| Tim Meadows | ... | Franklin#2 Live |
| Horatio Sanz | ... | Pig Pen Live |
| Rachel Dratch | ... | Marcy Live |
| Sketch |
| Ben Affleck | ||
| Jimmy Fallon | ... | Todd Newton#2 |
| Darrell Hammond | ... | Bruce Vilanch |
| Chris Kattan | ... | Mango#11 |
| Horatio Sanz | ... | Camryn Manheim#1 |
♬Everything But The Girl - "Missing"
♬Jennifer Lopez - "Waiting for Tonight"
| Sketch | Donnie's Party |
| Ben Affleck | ... | Donnie Bartalotti#1 |
| Jimmy Fallon | ... | Pat Sullivan#3 |
| Horatio Sanz | ... | Frankie Hilbert#2 |
| Rachel Dratch | ... | Denise McDenna#3 |
| Cartoon |
| Andy Daly | ... | actor Voice |
| Andy Daly | ... | director Voice |
| Ana Gasteyer | ... | actress Voice |
| Tracy Morgan | ... | Mr. T#2 Voice |
| Show | Fretts Film Forum |
| Ben Affleck | ... | Chip Knowles |
| Jimmy Fallon | ... | Roger E. Marshall |
| Will Ferrell | ... | J. Jay Granger |
| Ana Gasteyer | ... | Carol Fretts |
| Cheri Oteri | ... | Joanna Pilsner |
| Show | FANatic |
| Ben Affleck | ... | Jason |
| Jimmy Fallon | ... | Kenny VanMacintosh |
| Molly Shannon | ... | Anna Nicole Smith#1 |
♬The Goo Goo Dolls - "Iris"
♬The Smashing Pumpkins - "Today"
♬The Smashing Pumpkins - "Disarm"
| Weekend Update |
| Darrell Hammond | ... | announcer Voice |
| Colin Quinn | ||
| Will Ferrell | ... | George W. Bush#4 |
| Chris Parnell | ... | John McCain#2 |
| Tim Meadows | ... | Alan Keyes#3 |
| Jimmy Fallon | ... | janitor Voice |
| Sketch |
| Ben Affleck | ... | Ari |
| Chris Kattan | ... | Josh Zimmerman#7 |
| Cheri Oteri | ... | Laura Zimmerman#7 |
| Horatio Sanz | ... | salesman |
| Sketch | Police Training |
| Ben Affleck | ... | Gregory Puccinelli |
| Jimmy Fallon | ... | John Helman |
| Tracy Morgan | ... | recruit |
| Chris Parnell | ... | Blaunski |
| Horatio Sanz | ... | recruit |
| Molly Shannon | ... | Sally O'Malley#2 |
| Rachel Dratch | ... | recruit |
| Game Show | Who Wants To Be Groped By An Eleven Thousand-aire? |
| Ben Affleck | ... | J.L. Frank |
| Will Ferrell | ... | Jay Thomas |
| Ana Gasteyer | ... | Sharon Gaynor |
| Chris Kattan | ... | Andy Cantrall |
| Cheri Oteri | ... | Tina Hagar |
| Chris Parnell | ... | announcer Voice |
⁕Darrell Hammond is listed under "Stunts" in the end credits.
| Total Appearances | Characters | Impressions | Voices | Stills | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Ben Affleck | 10 | 1 | 1 | ||
| Fiona Apple | 1 | ||||
| Gwyneth Paltrow | 1 | ||||
| G.E. Smith | 1 | ||||
| Andy Daly | 1 | 2 | |||
| Jimmy Fallon | 6 | 1 | 1 | 1 | |
| Will Ferrell | 4 | 2 | 1 | ||
| Ana Gasteyer | 4 | 2 | |||
| Darrell Hammond | 3 | 2 | 1 | ||
| Chris Kattan | 3 | 2 | |||
| Tim Meadows | 2 | 1 | 1 | ||
| Tracy Morgan | 2 | 1 | 1 | ||
| Cheri Oteri | 3 | 1 | |||
| Chris Parnell | 3 | 1 | 1 | ||
| Colin Quinn | 1 | ||||
| Horatio Sanz | 5 | 1 | 1 | ||
| Molly Shannon | 2 | 1 | 1 | ||
| Rachel Dratch | 3 | 1 | |||
| 55 | 9 | 10 | 10 |