| Cold Opening | Backstage |
| Sketch | Cabrini Green |
| Musical Performance | "Right and Wrong" |
| Sketch | The Wart Hog |
| Musical Sketch | I Play The Maids |
| Sketch | The Cute Shop |
| Musical Performance | "Soul Kiss" |
| Sketch | One Shoe Emma |
| Sketch | Cabrini Green |
| Joan Cusack | ... | student |
| Nora Dunn | ... | student |
| Danitra Vance | ... | Cabrini Green Jackson |
| Weekend Update |
| Dennis Miller | ||
| Anthony Michael Hall |
Sophomoric review of "High Jinx" | |
| Robert Downey Jr. | ||
| A. Whitney Brown |
| Sketch | The Wart Hog |
| Robert Downey Jr. | ... | Jake |
| Jon Lovitz | ... | emcee |
| Randy Quaid | ... | The Wart Hog |
| Terry Sweeney | ... | Pils Olafssen |
| A. Whitney Brown | ... | detective |
| Don Novello | ... | detective |
| Nils Nichols | ... | detective |
| Don Pardo | ... | announcer Voice |
| John Swartzwelder | ... | police officer |
| Sketch |
| Nora Dunn | ... | mother |
| Anthony Michael Hall | ... | Craig Sundberg |
| Jon Lovitz | ... | Mr. Undersecretary |
| Randy Quaid | ... | guard |
| Terry Sweeney | ... | scientist |
| Don Pardo | ... | announcer Voice |
| Akira Yoshimura | ... | Professor Chin |
| Sketch | One Shoe Emma |
| Robert Downey Jr. | ... | patron |
| Jon Lovitz | ... | Huck |
| Dennis Miller | ... | prince |
| Randy Quaid | ... | George |
| Danitra Vance | ... | Emma |
| Sketch | Cabrini Green |
| Oprah Winfrey | ... | mother |
| Joan Cusack | ... | student |
| Nora Dunn | ... | student |
| Danitra Vance | ... | Cabrini Green Jackson |
| Weekend Update |
| Dennis Miller | ||
| Anthony Michael Hall |
Sophomoric review of "High Jinx" | |
| Robert Downey Jr. | ||
| A. Whitney Brown |
⁕Dennis Miller forgets to remove his microphone when he stands up to demonstrate the Line of Death on the map. The wire jerks him back, and he ad-libs "The Line of Death is right around my neck."
♬Free - "All Right Now"
♬"Superman" Theme
| Sketch | The Wart Hog |
| Robert Downey Jr. | ... | Jake |
| Jon Lovitz | ... | emcee |
| Randy Quaid | ... | The Wart Hog |
| Terry Sweeney | ... | Pils Olafssen |
| A. Whitney Brown | ... | detective |
| Don Novello | ... | detective |
| Nils Nichols | ... | detective |
| Don Pardo | ... | announcer Voice |
| John Swartzwelder | ... | police officer |
| Joe Forristal | ... | contestant |
| Sketch |
| Oprah Winfrey | ... | scientist |
| Nora Dunn | ... | mother |
| Anthony Michael Hall | ... | Craig Sundberg |
| Jon Lovitz | ... | Mr. Undersecretary |
| Randy Quaid | ... | guard |
| Terry Sweeney | ... | scientist |
| Don Pardo | ... | announcer Voice |
| Akira Yoshimura | ... | Professor Chin |
| Sketch | The Cute Shop |
| Oprah Winfrey | ... | police officer |
| Joan Cusack | ... | owner |
| Evie Murray | ... | customer |
| Nils Nichols | ... | customer |
| Musical Performance | "Soul Kiss" |
⁕Joe Jackson was under a four-minute time limit for this performance. After checking a stopwatch on his piano, he blows a whistle to abruptly end the song and says "That's it, four minutes."
| Sketch | One Shoe Emma |
| Oprah Winfrey | ... | Sally Ingalls |
| Robert Downey Jr. | ... | patron |
| Jon Lovitz | ... | Huck |
| Dennis Miller | ... | prince |
| Randy Quaid | ... | George |
| Danitra Vance | ... | Emma |
| Total Appearances | Characters | Impressions | Voices | Stills | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Oprah Winfrey | 7 | ||||
| Joe Jackson | 2 | ||||
| Mark McKinney | 1 | 1 | |||
| Joan Cusack | 2 | ||||
| Robert Downey Jr. | 5 | 1 | 1 | ||
| Nora Dunn | 4 | 2 | |||
| Anthony Michael Hall | 2 | 1 | |||
| Jon Lovitz | 4 | 1 | |||
| Dennis Miller | 2 | ||||
| Randy Quaid | 3 | ||||
| Terry Sweeney | 2 | ||||
| Danitra Vance | 4 | 1 | |||
| A. Whitney Brown | 2 | ||||
| Don Novello | 1 | ||||
| Tom Davis | 1 | 1 | |||
| Lorne Michaels | 1 | ||||
| Evie Murray | 1 | ||||
| Nils Nichols | 2 | ||||
| Don Pardo | 2 | 2 | |||
| Bob Van Ry | 1 | ||||
| John Swartzwelder | 1 | ||||
| Akira Yoshimura | 1 | ||||
| Joe Forristal | 1 | ||||
| 52 | 6 | 1 | 4 |