| Sketch | Dr. Shockley's House of Sperm |
| Rodney Dangerfield | ||
| Jane Curtin | ... | Rodney's wife |
| Garrett Morris | ... | customer |
| Bill Murray | ... | clerk |
| Laraine Newman | ... | nurse |
| Gilda Radner | ... | customer |
| Tom Davis | ... | customer |
| Brian Doyle-Murray | ... | customer |
| Paul Shaffer | ... | customer |
| Yvonne Hudson | ... | customer |
| Franne Lee | ... | customer |
| Matt Neuman | ... | customer |
| Sarah Paley | ... | customer |
| Liz Welch | ... | customer |